This last week I’ve looked for some outside voices that can balance out some of my challenging inner ones.  I’ve come back to a voice that has given me a lot of guidance and comfort over the last few years. Thich Nhat Hanh was a Buddhist monk and peace activist who was exiled from his native Vietnam in 1966 for refusing to take sides in his country’s brutal civil war.  As I’ve found myself full of emotion and energy to resist in some way, he reminds me that there IS a way to rebel that doesn’t involve more judgment, hate, and polarization.  He saw a radical way to “resist” that is life-affirming and compassionate.  And he saw harder times than these.  

I wanted to share some of his words with you this week.

I’ve been waiting for this election day (and waiting for it to be over) for months.  In my worst stretches, I found myself compulsively checking for new headlines – reflexively getting out my phone to look at the newest “election updates” in almost every spare moment.  My daughter would walk into the room and I’d put my phone away, but my head now was in Michigan or Arizona, or wherever the rally was taking place that constituted some form of “news.”  About two weeks ago I realized what was really happening: I was constantly looking for some small piece of evidence that I could use to deepen my hope that everything was going to turn out okay.  I was trying to alleviate my anxiety, and in doing so, I was adding to it significantly.  It was my classic “autopilot.”  We all have a set of patterns and behaviors driven by our ego that we default to when we’re moving quickly or mindlessly through our lives. 

For a few months now I’ve had the nagging feeling that someone I care about has been upset with me.  I care about her a lot, but we’re not that close.  So I was finding it extra hard to bring it up and just ask her about it.  I tried to put it out of my mind but it kept popping back up.  And the more time I spent with my feelings, the more clear it was to me that I should talk with her.  And the more certain I got about what I needed to do, the more terrified I got about actually doing it.